The most epic spam email ever

So I got this spam a little while back, and I couldn’t resist sharing. Here, in its entirety:

December 21, 2012:
Mayan Galactic Alignment
Once in 26,000 years

Celebrate the end of the Mayan Calendar,
the Sun aligning with the center of the Galaxy,
and the 2012 Winter Solstice.

Greetings ,

The “2012 Mayan Galactic Alignment” celebrates an astronomical event that happens once every 26,000 years.

Join me on a spectacular Cruise and Seminar-At-Sea to the sacred Mayan sites of the Yucatan, where we will gather in grand ceremonies and rituals that close a 5000-year era of darkness, and open a new eon of light – the ascension of humanity.

This is “the place to be on Dec. 21, 2012.”

The Carnival Triumph takes us to Chichen Itza and Cozumel, where we will honor this Time with ritual and ceremony, participate in seminars and healing while at Sea, and celebrate on a world class cruise ship.

On December 21, 2012, the Great Long Count Cycle, which began in 3114 BC, will end. The Fourth World will pass, and the “World of the Fifth Sun” will be born.

Now add your momentum to the vibrational energy that culminates in the peak spiritual event of the Millennium – the Winter Solstice, at the incredibly auspicious hour of 11:11 a.m. Universal Time on December 21, 2012. At that time, on that date, everything we know will change. We will enter a new world – a world of Ascension.

Learn more at

Now hear a F’REE Teleseminar with speakers who will be on the cruise:

Where will you be on Dec. 21, 2012 ?
We know where we will be – At this once-in-a-lifetime event !


– Workshops on the seminar-at-sea, as amazing speakers, such as Fred Alan Wolf, expert Mayan scholars, and enlightened spiritual leaders awaken our consciousness!

– Nightly Skywatch with Richard C. Hoagland, as we view the Galactic Algnment, a once-in-26,000-year event!

– Awesome Rituals, Initiations, and Fire Ceremonies at Mayan temples with Mayan Elders Hunbatz Men and Tomasa Lissell as we prepare to enter the “World of the Fifth Sun.”

– The Sun aligning with Hunab K’u, the Center of the Galaxy, in a spectacular Solstice light transmission and telescope array.

– The precise moment, 11:11 AM GMT, the end of the Mayan Long Count Calendar Cycle, witnessed in a Skywatch and Inner Journey to the Galactic Center, and with prayers, meditations, and light transmissions from the Ascended Masters.

– Visits to Chichen Itza and other pyramids and temples.

– Visit to San Gervasio, home of Ixchel, the Mayan Fertility Goddess, on Cozumel, and swim with her dolphins.

– Celebration of the Ascension of Humanity into a higher vibration with music, dance, food, and entertainment on a world class cruise ship.

– Honoring the date December 21, 2012, when the next cycle of human evolution begins, with transformative initiatory rituals by Mayan Elders, and meditation led by Babaji and other ascended beings.

This date is, by far, the epic metaphysical event of our lifetime.
And it comes once every 26,000 years!

Space is Very Limited. Learn More and Register Now at

Be a part of this vital process, as you contribute your spiritual energy to this keystone event. This gathering can transform the planet at a time when transformation is essential.

You are called to be a part of this planetary ascension of consciousness, at this time, in this place!

Space is Very Limited!
Learn More and Register Now at
Mention my name when you register.

“This is not a cruise. This is a Spiritual Experience. This is a spiritual awakening that will transform your life. You will pass from an age of darkness into an age of light. Your life will be blessed, and you will never be the same.”
The Immortal Babaji

Mayan Apocalypse cruise. It’s hard to beat that.

One Reply to “The most epic spam email ever”

  1. The best thing about these “alignment” claims is that they are talking about an “alignment” of two points that only happens “once in a blah blah blah gazillion years.” But two points are ALWAYS aligned. They are only TWO POINTS. Gahh.

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